That extra push…

I was blown out of the water this weekend when two different people thanked me for believing in them. The crazy part was that, in my own eyes, I wasn’t doing anything special. There were things that these folks had done and I simply congratulated them and encouraged them to keep it up. I only did what I was taught as a child to do…

After I received the second thanks, I really pondered about why my actions were so abnormal, or extraordinary, and I came to this conclusion… People want to be praised but don’t praise each other. So, when someone does praise you, that praise catches you off guard.

Personally, I struggle daily with depression, feelings of inadequacy, and feelings of abandonment (just to name a few). As a resourceful person, I have been to a great many psychological websites, read more than my share of papers written on these issues, spoken with professionals and deduced a number of theories regarding these matters. I have also been very diligent in surrounding myself with positive people and people that I consider above me or at the level that I desire to be. You may be asking why and the simple answer is this… When I’m struggling the greatest, I want to know what I’m dealing with and I want to have people close by that their mere presence is a boost for me.

I’ve learned that whenever I have those down times, if I don’t get in the right place, I can spiral uncontrollably and the results aren’t pleasant. I become super withdrawn, lacking any desire except to ball up in the corner on the couch, and I’m not a nice person (understatement, of course). I understand the concept of “when it rains, it pours” also known as the Law of Attraction. I also know that life has a tendency of beating up on you. But, in all of that, we have to take a stand!!!

I’ve decided that I will follow a really easy, Biblical notion… “Do to others as you would have them do to you”, Luke 6:31 NIV. Another rule that I try to follow is one that my mother gave me, “If you can’t say something nice, then don’t say nothing.” People need to feel special. I need to feel special. There are times when I don’t feel special and I wished for someone to tell me that I was… I know how it feels.

We get enough of the negative side of life. As human beings, we have a knack for magnifying the uncool stuff and throwing it in people’s faces. We have perfected that art but who wants to be known as a professional mudslinger? Funny thing about slinging mud is that as long as you’re slinging it, YOUR hands are dirty.

All I’m saying today is to make a concerted effort to do good to someone, anyone… everyone today. We never know how that kind word (seed) will blossom into in YOUR future… We all need that extra push!!!

I love you ALL!!!
Stay Blessed,
Jackie

 

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Good Deeds

One of the easiest things to do is a good deed. Most of the time, it doesn’t require much on our part. The greatest thing about it is that you are thinking about someone other than yourself. But, there’s another side of the deeds and that is reaching out or recognizing the need for help…

There’s an older lady from our church, let’s call her ‘mother’, that I’ve grown very close to. She is definitely a one-of-a-kind woman, full of wisdom and energy. She and I can sit and talk about history for hours. Well, she is going on a trip today and asked if I could take her to the airport. That is not a problem. I can do that. But, here is the twist… she has to be at the airport between 5:00-5:30 am. When she said the time, I was thinking, “Are you serious?” But, what makes a deed good? It’s not about me but her. She was extremely hesitant in asking. While she asked, she actually told me not to come and that she’d be fine, then she said that she would rather that I didn’t come. Basically, she was thinking out loud, as many of us do, and she was looking at the cost for me to help her. But the cost isn’t great or insurmountable. All that this requires of me is to leave the house.

I have another friend that recently lost a sibling. They have been tight since birth and this was a great loss. The hard part about it is that my friend hasn’t been getting a whole lot of support from home. Their spouse is a devout Christian and the philosophy is to “put it in God’s hands”. That may be true but sometimes, I need a hug!!! Well, my friend decided to join a counseling group for those who’ve lost loved ones. In speaking with her, she realized that she was the only person of color in the group, the youngest person and her sibling was the youngest person to have passed in the group. On the outside, many would have taken a look at the makeup of the group and turned around and left. But, she didn’t and I’m proud of her for that.

I don’t know what it is about people but, we really need to take off the cape and peel the “S” off our chest. We aren’t Supermen/women. We have needs and there are people in place that are willing to do the deeds. Each one of us can stand to receive a good deed here and there but, each of us can stand to do some as well.

I love you ALL!!!
Stay Blessed,
Jackie