Tomorrow…

Kahlil Gibran said it best when he said, “The timeless in you is aware of life’s timelessness. And knows that yesterday is but today’s memory and tomorrow is today’s dream.”

Lately, I’ve been really thinking about the various changes that we go thru in life and how changes in one area have an affect on so many other areas of our life. What I have come back with is that some times change just simply STINKS!!!

You see, our church is going thru a MAJOR transition. Our pastor recently announced that he will be relocating to California and that we will be transitioning the ministry into and under his son’s leadership. So, our church will be merging with his son’s church. We are selling our property and liquidating assets. AND, I’m an employee of the church. This change is huge!!! But, this isn’t the only change that’s happening…

When a church closes, whether there is provision to go somewhere else or not, we are left with the decision of continuing with the merge or going somewhere else. I don’t care how spiritual you may be but we are not only following God but we are also following our leader. When our leader leaves, it has an affect. We have communed together and it’s like losing a loved one, partner or brother.

My view is a tiny bit different than many because, as the minister of music, I work directly with our pastor. He and I have spent time together. We’ve shared various victories, trials, and battles together. We’ve been thru the ringer together. One of the hardest parts of this is that I consider my pastor to be my friend.

If you’ve followed my letters, at all, you will see a common theme of relationship and my passion towards it. Over the past several months, I’ve really been battling with my emotions about friendships because once I connect with you… you have a friend for life. I’m also not an idiot and I know that “time waits for no man” and “seasons change” and “time brings about change” and “people change” and all of that. But, I am one who truly invests in those around me. I work hard. I play hard. And I love hard. To be totally honest, I can’t afford to keep losing friends… And the closing of a church, any church, can be the catalyst for that loss.

I told the worship team the other day that none of us know what tomorrow brings and that I truly love each of them and have enjoyed working with them. It took every ounce of strength that I had not to weep uncontrollably in front of them. We have been thru not only battles but all out wars together. We’ve laughed and cried. We celebrated victories and held each other in times of grief. I have to hold back the tears even as I write this letter.

Why is this so hard? It’s hard because I’m in love. I love my church. I love my pastor. I love my team. The mere thought of losing that love is enough to break my heart. And now the reality of calling everyone in to clean up and prepare the facilities for sell and liquidation brings that heartache right to the top. The problem is that I can’t keep smiling like everything is okay. It’s not okay…

How do we fix it? In this case, there isn’t a fix on decisions to be made. Do you explore the opportunity of relocating to California with the pastor? Do you continue with the church as she merges with his son’s ministry? Do you follow one of the other ministries that will be birthed? Do you find another church? So, many questions… But, wait!! There is one answer tho… Jesus.

In all thy getting, get understanding. When all of these questions arise, and they will, all we need to do is look to Him for the answers. The Word says that the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord. It also says to seek first the kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be added. We have to keep a kingdom mindset and that says, “He’s got our back!!”

I may be in love but He loved me first and best. I love Him enough to trust Him completely. It may be hard. It may be unbearable. But I know that WE WILL SURVIVE!!

But for the record… BK, Tina, Conia, Shameca, Tracy, Jeff, Michael, Kevin, Trevon, Irene, Derrick, the sound team, the media team, and everyone else that has worked with and on the Worship and Arts Department…

I love you and speak the blessings of God over each of your lives AND those connected to you.
I pray that God continues to favor you both now and in the future.
I pray that your worst days are behind you and your best is no longer coming but is HERE.
You have blessed my family’s and my life and I will never be able to express how much you truly mean to me.
I thank God for you.
-MJ

I love you ALL!!!
Stay Blessed,
Jackie

 

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